It’s not unusual for me to fall asleep listening to music. I’m used to waking up tangled in my headphones. Last night, was no exception. That’s when I got lost in paradise . . .
My idea of paradise on earth is probably much like yours.
Put an end to war, disease, famine, racism, hatred, terrorism, and jealousy. Replace it with peace, love, happiness, and togetherness. I’d be lying if I stopped there. I have a list of my own selfish requests:
- I could eat my favorite foods without worrying about the health consequences.
- People would get paid for doing what they love, not what they must in order to survive.
- Music would be the universal language. It would flow like running water, quenching thirsty hearts around the world.
- My children would never move far away. They would endorse the idea of building an underground tunnel connecting my home to theirs.
- There would be 34 hours in a day. That’s because this nap-obsessed girl needs 10 hours of extra sleep.
Keep dreaming, I know. We live in a fallen world. Yesterday, when I picked up my nine year old daughter from school, I was reminded of how tough life on earth can be. She was quiet. Quiet like holding back her tears quiet.
Me: What’s wrong?
Me: What happened?
Daughter: Someone called me “fat” while I was eating my sandwich.
The Mama Bear in me wanted to drive back to school and find the kid who spewed out this nonsense.
That’s what mama bears do, right? They protect their young, especially when their kids are not at fault. At the same time, I don’t parent with my head in the sand. I’m not one of those moms that thinks her kids are PERFECT 100% of the time. I’m pretty good at holding my kids accountable for their actions.
But in that moment, after hearing the heaviness in my daughter’s voice, I knew she was hurting. Still, I chose to silence my mama bear impulses. The last thing my daughter needed to hear was Mom going on a tirade about some other kid.
Instead I rallied around my own child, assuring her that these statements were unfounded.
They were lies.
My sweet girl, whose personality is eerily similar to mine (firstborn–over thinker), nodded her head while listening to me speak. She gave me a half smile, then finished swallowing the pain.
Me, on the other hand, I couldn’t let go of the heartache. It gnawed at me the entire afternoon, spilling over into the evening.
After putting baby to sleep, I crawled into bed with my headphones. Turned on Stolen Dance by Milky Chance, and let Clemens Rehbein do his thing. His gritty voice has a way of calming me down. The lyrics are kind of moody. And in a strange, ironic way, the song made me feel better.
Maybe that’s why I was able to release the sadness of the day.
What’s your idea of paradise on earth? Have you had a Mama Bear moment?